Sunday, March 30, 2008

John 20:19-31 - Thomas: Doubter and Follower

I. A Follower of Christ

When we normally think of Thomas we give him the classification Doubting Thomas. He is most famous for the story we read this morning, where he didn’t believe in the resurrection because he had not seen it for himself. We tend to look down on him because of his lack of faith, because of his doubt. Even Jesus seems to give him a backhanded compliment that doesn’t actually put him down, but tells us that blind faith is a bit better than his faith. “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”
And yet, the moral of this story isn’t for us to never doubt God, doubt Jesus, doubt our faith. Rather, what we see here is an example of Jesus dealing with the doubts of one of his followers, putting them to rest, and allowing them to move into belief.

To understand this better, I want to take us back to an earlier story that talks about Thomas. We don’t hear much from him or about him in the gospels. But he does show up in one earlier story with some illuminating words. It is in the story of Lazarus being raised from the dead and it can be found in John 11. If you remember, Lazarus was in Bethany, about two miles outside Jerusalem, he grew sick and died. Someone sent a messenger to Jesus and the disciples to encourage them to come, but Jesus did not come until after Lazarus had passed away. When Jesus did tell his disciples that he was going to head up to Bethany, they tried to stop him, “But Rabbi, a short while ago they tried to stone you, and yet you are going back there?” The disciples didn’t want to go up to Jerusalem because they knew it was dangerous. They knew that he would be facing his death by doing so. Which, as we have observed and celebrated these last weeks, is precisely what happened.

So the disciples don’t want Jesus to go. But Jesus tells them that he is going to go. Now, you have to read between the lines a bit here, but it is here nonetheless. It seems that some of the disciples must have wondered whether they should follow Jesus. They didn’t believe it was safe to head up to Jerusalem, and perhaps they thought that it would be better to just stay where they were, where it was safe. But then we hear the words of Thomas, “Let us also go, that we may die with him.”

Take that in for a minute. Thomas isn’t a doubter here. He is a man who is so dedicated to Jesus and his message that he is ready to go with him and die for him. As Jesus himself says in John 15:13, “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” Here Thomas isn’t plagued with doubts, he is set on a path. And the path could even lead to his death. But because of his love for Jesus, because of his belief in Jesus and everything Jesus stands for, he is ready to go with Jesus to the very end.

This is important to understand because it helps us to see that Thomas is not just a doubter. He is a true follower of Christ. And as we see in John 11 through 20, Thomas was not far off. He and the other disciples did follow Jesus into Jerusalem and watch as Jesus was taken, tortured and killed. Though Thomas was ready in John 11 to die with Jesus, he didn’t find that strength when Jesus was actually taken, but rather hid with the other disciples. And Jesus was crucified.

II. Doubts

But then some of the disciples start telling Thomas that they have seen Jesus raised from the dead. He just cannot believe them. It seems too good to be true.

Imagine yourself in Thomas’ shoes for a moment. Imagine grieving with him at the loss of Jesus. Imagine going through all that he had gone through this last week. And then, something happens that is beyond your greatest hope. He who was dead is now alive. You don’t want to trust it. You don’t want to get your hopes up. You don’t want to be disappointed yet again. You just aren’t sure that this could really be happening. You almost don’t want to let your hopes get up because it just might be true. And you aren’t sure whether you could really handle that.

It’s the way we’re built. We protect ourselves by preparing ourselves for the worst so that when it happens we are better able to handle it. We figure if we prepare ourselves to be disappointed, then when we are disappointed we are ready for it at least… and if, for some reason, things do go our way then we will be able to enjoy it all the more because we aren’t really expecting things to go our way at all. It is a self-defense mechanism that we all learn to build into ourselves. It starts when you are a child with your first crush, when you find out that person you like doesn’t like you back; and it continues when you apply for a job and don’t get it. The disappointments in your life help you to build up a wall of skepticism and pessimism that is designed to keep you from getting hurt. But this is not what the resurrection is about. For when the resurrection happens we discover that not only can the best happen, it does happen.

But Thomas wasn’t willing to accept that. He wanted more than words from the other disciples, he wanted to experience the risen Christ in his own life, only then would he believe. Only then would he accept the resurrection. This isn’t doubt for the sake of it. This isn’t doubt just because it’s the thing to do. This is real doubt from a follower of Christ who just cannot wrap their mind around God’s true power. And there’s nothing wrong with this kind of doubt. It is honest doubt. It is real doubt. It cannot be shut away and hid because if it is it will grow and fester and destroy the person trying to hide it.

I fear that when people come to us with difficult questions about our faith and we just tell them to ignore the questions, we are not doing them service. Rather by telling people that they cannot doubt, we are hurting their faith.

III. Jesus’ Answer

I believe that Jesus gives us a good example of how to deal with doubt here. He doesn’t attack Thomas for it, he doesn’t put him down and tell him that his faith and faithfulness doesn’t matter because of his doubts. Instead, Jesus answers Thomas’ doubts. Thomas says that unless he sees the nail marks in Jesus’ hands and puts his finger where the nails were, and puts his hand into his side, he will not believe. These are pretty tough requirements that Thomas has put forward. Some might say that he is asking too much of God. Some might say that he is testing God.

And yet we are told that a week later Jesus does appear to the disciples and to Thomas and Jesus gives Thomas exactly what he asks for, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.”

Jesus doesn’t just tell him to stop doubting, to believe. No, Jesus gives him what he asked for and then tells him to believe. I think this is important. It shows that when doubts are real, when they matter, Jesus will answer them and allow us to see the truth. It tells me that Jesus doesn’t hold our doubts against us but gives us the answers to move past them.

A number of weeks ago one of the adult Bible studies talked about Gideon in the Old Testament and his testing of God. And they asked whether it was sinful to test, to question, God. Many of us seem to have it in our head that it is. I think we get this from Jesus and his response to the devil when he is tempted in the desert and he tells the devil, quoting scripture, that you should not put the Lord your God to the test.

And yet Gideon’s questioning of God is not put down in the Bible, and Thomas’ testing of God is not put down here. And I realized that there needs to be a distinction. There is testing of God, there is questioning of what he’s about, that is harmful and dangerous and a faith killer, and then there’s questioning and testing that is honored by God and answered by God. Both Gideon and Thomas were followers of God. Thomas, as we saw earlier, was ready to die for his Lord. And yet, when God was working miraculously in events around them, they could not bring themselves to believe. Perhaps they did not trust themselves. Perhaps they did not trust the world around them. And God honored their doubts by answering them. I believe that we can learn from them. Doubting the tenants of your faith is not the same as testing God. And doubt does not need to lead us to unbelief. It didn’t for Gideon, it didn’t for Thomas.

Rather, if you have questions that you cannot find easy answers to, I encourage you to take those questions to God, to lay them at his feet and to allow him to answer. I cannot tell you how he will, for God tends to work in different and unusual ways. But I do believe that he will answer those questions and bring resolution to your doubts. So that, as Jesus said to Thomas he will also say to you, “Stop doubting and believe.” Not because your doubts were wrong, not because they were unfounded, but because he has answered them.

And then you can join Thomas in his confession of faith, in his realization that Jesus had answered his doubts, and you can join him in his words of worship as he turned to Jesus and called him “my Lord and my God.” May you find a path from doubt to worship; may you find a path from questions to answers; may you find a path from uncertainty to faith and faithfulness. Amen.

Sunday, March 02, 2008

Ephesians 5:8-14 "Seeing in the Dark"

As a child I used to find myself scared while I lay in bed. Maybe it was a movie I had seen a part of that scared me, or maybe it was a weird shadow in the window, or a noise I heard under the bed. I used to lay in bed, shivering, afraid. I remember that as a young child it was monsters and witches I was afraid of, but as I got older it was demons. I guess my fears became more Christian as I got older. But in ways, the fears became more real. I found myself truly afraid of the dark, afraid of what I could not see, afraid of what could be lurking somewhere in the darkness, ready to get me.

But I discovered a trick that put an end to these fears. The trick was to turn to God. The trick was to pray. When I went to God in prayer, when I asked for his protection, I realized that I was protected and I didn’t need to fear the darkness anymore. “Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.” With Christ shining on me, there was nothing in the darkness to fear. When I was focused on God, when I was praying to Jesus, the fears of darkness no longer held any power over me.

This is what it means to no longer live in the darkness. This is what it means to wake up and allow Christ to shine on us. Even when we’re surrounded by darkness, even when we feel that we’re blind, we don’t have to have anything to do with the darkness around us. Instead we can focus on the Light. Instead we can focus on Christ. And when we do this, he will deliver us from the darkness that surrounds us

I. Children of Light

Ephesians 5 tells us that we no longer live in darkness. Now we are in the light of the Lord. But then it tells us that we have a choice of how to live. Are we going to live like we did when we lived in darkness or are we going to live as children of light? Ephesians 5 tells us what it looks like to live as children of light. It tells us that the fruit of the light is goodness, righteousness and truth. It tells us that living in the light is doing things that please God. When I look at darkness and light, I believe, though, that there is something else that is inherent in being children of light. If we are living as children of light, if we are showing the fruits of light, then we will no longer live fearful lives, afraid of the world around us, afraid of things that go bump in the night. Instead we will live with confidence and courage. We will trust that God is caring for us, that he will meet our needs. And we will find ourselves able to do things that we didn’t think we could do.

Now I’ve been talking a lot about actual darkness, and actual fear of the darkness a lot so far, but to truly allow this message from Ephesians 5 to penetrate our lives, we need to move past the literal. When we look at the darkness of this world, when we look at the things going on around us in our culture, in our lives, we often find ourselves responding with fear. We worry about a whole lot, from terrorist attacks to the collapse of our economy. We worry about what our children and grandchildren are going to come in contact with in school, and we worry about whether we’re going to be able to pay our bills. Spiritually, we worry about a culture around us that seems to like darkness a little too much and seems to be ready to fall off the ledge into the abyss of moral and spiritual decay.

But as children of the light, as children of God, we are called to stand against the darkness, we are called to shine the light of truth into those dark places. And we no longer need to live in fear of the things around us. Fear is never a good reason to make decisions. Oh, fear helps you make good short term decisions, usually decisions about survival. But fear doesn’t give you the tools you need to make decisions about what God has planned for your life. It is never good to decide large things in your life because of your fear. When you allow fear to be central in your decision making process, you are living in darkness. But when you allow God to be central to your decision making process, then you are truly living as a child of the light.

II. No Fear

But what does life without fear look like? Does it mean that we are foolhardy or overconfident? No, life lived trusting in God looks exactly like Ephesians 5 says it looks. It is a life centered in goodness, righteousness and truth. When your decisions aren’t centered around your fears, then you start deciding based on what is good, on what is right and on what is true. Whether it’s a decision about whether to cheat on a test at school or whether to share your faith with a friend, once you stop fearing failure, once you stop worrying about what people will think, then you start deciding to do what is right. This is living in the light.

When we live in the light, we sometimes do things that may look foolhardy to those around us, but we aren’t being reckless. Rather we’re being responsible with the gifts that God has given us and the directions that God has given us. God can use us to make a difference in the world, but only if we don’t allow ourselves to be afraid of the world, only if we don’t allow ourselves to be afraid of failure.

God has brought light to the world. In doing so he has conquered the darkness, and therefore we just don’t have to live in fear of darkness any more. The culture around us that is turned against God, it has no power over us. We can confront it and trust that God will get us through. We can believe that God will work with and through us to shine a light on the darkness and break it down.

And yet, so many Christians do live in fear of the darkness. So many of us do allow ourselves to see the godless world around us as something that we need to hide from, that we need to protect ourselves and our families from. But, as Ephesians 5 tells us, we no longer live in the darkness. We now live in the light. We need to begin acting like this were true. We need to begin to live courageously. We need to allow God to truly be bigger than the things we are scared of, the things of this world that keep us down. Our fears are truly nothing in relation to God’s power and his plans for us and his light.

III. Night Walks

I began this morning talking about how as a child I found myself irrationally afraid of the dark. Through the message we have gone from talking about literal darkness to the spiritual darkness that surrounds us. But I want to end this morning by talking again about literal darkness. You see, having spent time praying I found that I had conquered my fear of the dark. Not only am I no longer afraid of the dark, I now somewhat enjoy it. Through high school, I would regularly go out at night, after dark, and find a place where I could sit in the darkness and stare at the sky, enjoying the many stars in the heavens. Something that is much easier to do when you’re not afraid of the dark. And in college, I had a friend and we would occasionally go out for night walks. We would drive up (in his car, I was carless at the time) to the foothills and the mountains a half hour up the highway from our college and we would find some forest road and drive out to it until we found a path. One time we got extremely lucky and found a wonderful dried up river bed. Yes, we almost got his car stuck trying to get to it, but it was the greatest adventure. We didn’t take any flashlights. Instead we let our eyes adjust to the moonlight, and then we started hiking up the dried up river bed. It was truly beautiful. It was absolutely amazing. The forest noises weren’t scary but rather were wondrous. The darkness did not hide dangers from us, rather it gave us the opportunity to discover the beauty of God’s creation in a different light. It was an amazing and beautiful night as we walked up that river bed exploring the nighttime forest.

It is the kind of experience that I wouldn’t have been able to have if I allowed my fear of the dark to keep me from going. That is what fears do. They hold us back. They keep us from experiencing what it is that God has given us. So, this day, be a child of the light. Don’t live as if you still lived in the darkness. Live in the light. Let go of your fears. And allow God to show you new and wonderful things. “Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”